So what happened. I was having lunch. Dad had an egg on the stovetop and he stepped away for a minute. I noticed it was burning, so I thought, figured the right thing to do was prevent the egg from burning. So I moved that pan off the stovetop. When he came back upstairs, I told him, I’d moved his egg. He immediately retaliated with “well why didn’t you turn off the stove then?” You know, with his slightly raised tone. I decided not to answer, hoping he would come to see where he was wrong.

This was what I was thinking. I just saved your egg from burning, possibly the pan too, and that’s all you say? Furthermore, how do I know what he wants to do? Maybe he needs to continue cooking the egg, flip it on the other side, or maybe there was something else after the egg, I don’t know? I thought he would return soon and switch the stove on/off accordingly to what he needed to do next.

It should be obvious now that communication with this individual does not come easy. I choose when and when not to speak, hope to de-escalate the situations as much as possible. Because when something happens, who gets blamed on? He’s the type of person to yell at you when he thinks its your fault, and say nothing when its determined its his fault.

Today has been a stressful day. A day which appeared to be light hearted, an early shift of volunteer work in the morning, come home, get a break before my friends come over for the Superbowl – from the sounds you’d think it was a light day.

The stress actually started before the day. I texted my friends whether they could make it, their dinner plans. You see when i host I like to have this stuff organized. One of them wasn’t clear on their RSVP, the others didnt comment on dinner. My roommate who I have to coordinate with – I’ve found I’m incapable of coordinating with him. He likes to have things his way, and I find him deeply inconsiderate as a person.

During my morning volunteer shift, I had a slight breakdown after lunch. I found myself over thinking every action I was taking. Overanalyzing it, etc. It got to a point where I needed to take a short break to sit down and just breathe. I know I sometimes need a break because of my social anxiety, but this time I was kinda just on my own, overthinking.

Coming home after my shift, I usually get a mental exercise by doing yoga and taking a sitz bath. However this was partly interrupted by my roommate in the kitchen. Ugh.

So we go onto Superbowl, my friend s are here. And here is my roommate, trying to take over the stage. Not only have I spent little time with him, due to little common interests, but even this moment spending time with him I was irritated by his commenting throughout the game. He is so distracting. Maybe I have am biased because of knowing him now as a person. I feel we took turns taking shots at each other tonight. I let my mental practice down tonight.