Doubt

I still have feelings and thoughts of doubt. Will I be happy again? Will I be able to be able to be the best version of my self? Living with confidence and daringly?

When I compare the old version of my self vs the new me (post 2017) there’s like a distinct difference. But I don’t know how to describe it. I was more naiive then, my goals were all around maximizing fun and opportunities. Nowadays I’m much more wary. Caring for my health, physically and mentally. Is the top of my mind.

I should treat it as growth though. Whatever I’ve learned through this period, what’s made me sad, what gives me sad feelings, I should take that and move forward. I’ve been through the good and the bad. And I can say that the good wasn’t always as it seemed. There were dark moments within those periods that only I knew about, random panic and anxiety attacks. Nowadays I’m much more aware of mental or physical stresses.